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August 28, 2006
Contraception and the Catholic Family
Obviously this is big topic, particularly in the United States. Materialistic cultures tend to see contraception as a right that they should have, since it allows material gain (less children = less expenses and more time to work). It also seems obvious that cultures which emphasize the individual develop more selfish people, which leads to a culture embracing contraception.
In America I would frankly be scared to ask the question: how many Catholics are using contraception to prevent children. Just to clarify going in, the Catechism says this:
CCC 2370. Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality. These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, “every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible” is intrinsically evil.
The quoted passage refers back to Humane Vitae, an encyclical letter I believe most Catholics are at least somewhat familiar with. What this passage means is that we should freely engage in sex with our spouses without using contraception. It does allow for “periodic continence,” which means that for a time (provided you have adequate, unselfish reasons) you can simply abstain from sex during the time of the month you are most likely to get pregnant. It’s important to note here the things that we are not allowed to do:
- Use artificial contraception, birth control, or any time of morning after pill, etc.
- Make a decision that we are done having children, even if this is practicing natural family planning in order to carry out this decision.
- Use natural family planning without a sufficient, unselfish reason for doing so.
These are perhaps three of the most misunderstood points concerning marriage for American Catholics.
Why Can’t We Use Artificial Contraception?
In short, contraception attempts to stop the will of God from giving us what is a great gift: a child. To explain further, I should start with a bit of history.
From the beginning of the Christian church contraception and abortion were always tied together and always condemned as very sinful. Both take what is a great good (your child) and throw that gift of God away for selfish reasons. We believe (and Scripture states plainly) that children are always a gift of God. Not sometimes. Not when it is convenient for us. Always. Whenever God gives the gift of a child He does it for a specific reason that we are typically not aware of. By trying to prevent this gift, we are suggesting we do not trust God (in choosing to give it to us) or care (we are too concerned about our material wealth/free time/lifestyle to allow for this gift). If the gift comes to us outside of marriage, well there are other passages of the Catechism that deal with the importance of sex only within the marriage bond.
It wasn’t until the 1930’s that contraception was allowed by any Christian church (note that this is long after the Reformation). The Anglican church first allowed contraception for “serious” causes. Since then – especially with the advent of the pill – every Christian church has changed their mind and accepted contraception except the Catholic Church. Of course, the Anglican church is now leading the way with homosexual bishops, women priests, and many other things that have been universally condemned by Christian churches for almost 2,000 years.
Contraception violates the martial covenant. In short, when you give yourself sexually to your spouse, you should be giving them all of you. This is one reason sex must be within marriage, because only once you have given your life to a person can you give them yourself fully in the martial act. By introducing contraception, you try and prevent the natural consequences of sex and you refuse one part of your sexuality to your spouse. In other words, you do not fully give yourself to your spouse if you refuse to allow for the natural consequences of the gift.
Being a Better Family
Part of this blog’s goal is to advocate the authentically Catholic family. By living out the truth of Catholic teaching on contraception, you become more Catholic. This is an odd saying, but in essence you become set apart from the world by choosing to allow for a larger family. This often means less possessions, more work (it isn’t easy), and a self-sacrificial mindset. Through these children, however, you put your possessions in heaven. And you become more of a child of God. Remember, God doesn’t make laws (or Church doctrine) to punish us, but to free us from sin and enable us to get to heaven.
When others do a second take, just smile and be proud of the witness you give. Your family can counter what passes for wisdom in our world. And when people ask the classic question (“Do you know what causes that?”) just smile and say, “Yes, love.”
God bless,
Jay
Posted by jay at August 28, 2006 10:05 PM
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Comments
Excellent post Jay!
Posted by: Elena at August 29, 2006 03:12 PM
I took a long look at my church during mass last Sunday...It is a huge church ... I did not see HUGE Families. I think the largest family I saw was a couple with 3 small children.
Posted by: Terri at August 29, 2006 03:26 PM
Thank you. I am looking for information just like this. What a Blessing that I stumbled onto your blog.
Posted by: Mary at September 4, 2006 11:49 PM
My spouse pulls out when he's about to finish, is this a form of contraceptive?
Posted by: Dee at September 11, 2006 03:47 PM
A note about natural family planning- if used correctly (which does require a lot of self-discipline of both husband and wife) it is MORE effective than the birth control pill. Of course when you allow God into your married life you need to embrace and be prepared for surprises! But couples who use Natural Family Planning (NFP) are naturally more excepting of an unexpected pregnancy because they understand God's workings and plans for their bodies and their lives.
I would love to see the Catholic Church become more vocal about the benefits of NFP. I believe it is very misunderstood. If more couples knew the truth, I believe it would be embraced by many more Catholics!
Posted by: Tina at October 3, 2006 02:19 PM
I have had a conversation with my priest about this and he assures me couples use NFP. However, on church on Sunday all the couples I see are thirty-somethings with one or two kids. Since NFP is working so well for everyone, maybe the priest needs to have a few homilies on reasons to postpone children.
Posted by: Natalie at April 5, 2007 08:36 AM
