Living Catholicism: Sex, God and Marriage

« Catholic Carnival XXIII: Easter Joy and Terri Schiavo | Main | Simple Ways to "Preach the Gospel Always" »

April 01, 2005

Sex, God and Marriage

In our day and age, Sex and Marriage are terribly misunderstood. There was a very popular book on the subject named A Plea for Purity that has been recently renamed Sex, God, and Marriage and released in pdf format for free. I loaded the book up on our site so that you can download and read it. It is an excellent examination of the role of Marriage in our lives as well as the role of sex within marriage. Click here to open the pdf of Sex, God, and Marriage. It does require Adobe pdf reader software, which you can get for free here.

The book is an excellent overview and features a forward by Mother Teresa. The author's introduction includes this passage:

As a pastor I have counseled many people over the years, both single and married. For many of them, the sexual sphere is not an area of joy but one of frustration, confusion, and even despair. People look for unity of heart and soul with one another, but they are so blinded by the notion of romantic love that their deepest longings remain obscured. They know that marriage and sexual union is a gift from God; that it should be the most intimate and rewarding relationship a man and a woman can share. But they wonder why it has become the source of such loneliness and pain for them and for so many others.

I am no social scientist. But if the findings of recent studies have made anything clear it is this: the fallout caused by our culture's acceptance of casual sex is socially devastating. More than half of all marriages in the United States fail. Almost forty percent of America's children live in different houses than their biological fathers. Poverty, violent crime, delinquency, promiscuity, alcohol and drug abuse, mental illness, and suicide are all rooted in the breakdown of the family and the erosion of the marriage bond.

At the same time, those who save sexual activity until marriage (though their numbers are dwindling) are far less likely to have an affair or divorce, and those who commit themselves to one lifelong partner lead happier lives.

And one of my favorite passages from the book:

If a marriage is to be truly healthy, it must be founded in the order of God – on unity of spirit, heart, and soul. Most people today, including those of us who claim to be Christians, have no idea how much God has prepared for those who truly love and honor him. When we embrace God's order for our relationships, we will experience God's blessings. The experiences of the heart that God can give in a true engagement or marriage are greater than we can imagine. Too many
of us live only in the world of the senses – of sleeping, eating, and drinking – and never take time to really turn to what is much more vital: our inner life. This is also true in so many marriages today. Sex is the focal point, and often unity of heart is not even sought or
mentioned. Is it any wonder that so few couples remain faithful to each other for life?

Anyone who has lived near the ocean knows something of nature's power in the pull of high and low tides. In marriage, as in friendship, there are high and low tides. When a relationship is at low ebb, it is all too easy for us to lose patience, to distance ourselves from our partner, and even to abandon efforts toward a renewal of love. When God is at the center, we can turn to him and find faith and strength even at our lowest ebb.

The more we live up to the image of God in which we are created, the more strongly will we sense that God must remain our center, and that his commandments are fitting for us. We will sense that his commandments are not laid on us as alien laws and commands. Rather,
we will see that they are in keeping with our true nature as created in his image. But the more we betray and destroy God's image within us, the more his rulership will appear to us as something foreign, a moral compulsion that crushes us.

It's worth your time to sit and read - especially since the publisher has begun providing it for free. Even strong and loving marriages will benefit from the bits of wisdom that can be gleaned from the book.

God bless,
Jay

Posted by jay at April 1, 2005 08:40 AM